It was 15 years ago tonight that a monster was born.
The two highlights of my high school career centered around acceptance into the Governor's Honors Program in 1990 and the Georgia State Thespian Conference.
My senior year, I was a thespian leader. Each school selected two people to go and represent them in the opening night performance, and also assisted in the set up and maintenance of the conference.
The conference (which is going on right now) involves performances, workshops, college recruitments, a fair, and other theatre inspired festivities. For kids like myself, it was the chance to be around other people doing what we loved over one weekend.
For seniors, it is also a chance to audition for college scholarships and the ONE Georgia State Thespian Scholarship. Thousands of high school students attend. Hundreds of high school students go head to head for these scholarships.
I remember auditioning early on the Saturday morning. I did okay, and a few hours later, I checked the scholarship callback board. I had a few callbacks for schools I had zero interest in attending.
My nemesis, Mr. Norcross High School himself, Jeff Burnett, would audition later. I remember driving back to the hotel, and Jeff was nearly vomiting from nerves. This of course, tickled me to no end. I drove Jeff to his audition and waited patiently for him to walk out.
I remember standing at the end of the hall when he ran out. He looked like he was about to explode. I remember walking - what felt like in slow motion - and hearing him scream, "yes! yes! yes!" and then seeing a SEA of judges follow him out of the room.
He had callbacks from just about every college.
"I" wanted to vomit.
For the next six hours, I stalked the parking lot of the school across from the civic center screaming at God. "I thought this is what you wanted me to do! HELLO!? GIVE! ME!! A!!! SIGN!!!!"
The final goodbye to the conference would have everyone filing back into the auditorium for a last minute notes and words of inspiration. I, of course, was having none of this. I sulked so hard, steam rose off me.
I completely forgot that awards were to be handed out. The awards for best plays, and best performances for those schools that performed were handed out. I even won an award for writing, but I didn't even care. I remember thinking, "thanks, I appreciate this certificate. But my life is over!"
I sat back down, completely forgetting about the big conference scholarship. Linda Wise and Pam Ware stood on the stage and began talking about this person's talent, drive and passion. "And this year, the Georgia State Thespian Scholarship goes to.... from Norcross High School..."
My nemesis, sitting right in front of me, leapt to his feet and began pumping his hand in the air, screaming and howling. My heart stopped beating and I began to imagine his head exploding into a billion pieces. "I" began to scream - kind of like the way Kathryn does in "Silence in of the Lambs" when the light with the basket goes up the well and she sees the bloody nails scraping up the walls.
"...Chadwick Darnell."
Do what?
My nemesis, slowly sank into his seat, turning around to extend his hand, "yo, Chadro, congrats," he said quietly.
I couldn't move. Everyone jumped up to the feet. Everyone began cheering and clapping. I just sat there till Jeni Moore pulled me to my feet and said, "you have to go up there!"
I don't remember the walk up the stage, but I remember standing at the podium and Pam Ware saying, "well... say something."
I think I said, "I can't breathe."
And we walked off the stage. Linda Wise put her arm around me and said, "baby, you're going to be huge one day."
Linda Wise was that intimidating force that scared you senseless. She was smart. Talented. Fierce. Real. She was a judge for the GHP auditions. She was a judge for the scholarships. She was our leader for the leaders of the conference.
It was 15 years ago tonight, holding that scholarship in my hand, that any self doubt I ever had about myself, vanished. THAT was my sign. Whenever I questioned, I needed to look no further than standing on that stage, in between Linda and Pam.
I went back as a judge for a few a few years. I loved working with the students and suggesting better pieces for them and encouraging them the way Linda did for me.
Last week, I was driving down Hollywood Blvd and I came up with an idea for a new script - one that I'll do someday about high school theatre competitions. The excitement and the drama. At that age, you DO think, "I thought this is what you wanted me to do! My life is OVER!"
I just did a Google search on the Georgia Thespians and learned about the conference this weekend.
But I also read that Linda Wise just passed away on January 27th and the funeral is tomorrow. Oh, my heart broke.
And who knows... maybe it was Linda whispering in my ear about that story. "Remember when you were in high school... someone should write a script..." I can hear her now with her husky voice.
She retired from teaching. But anyone who had the honor of being under her direction, whether it be 4 years in their high school, or like me, a few weekends here and there - they know what am impact she has had on our lives. Holly Hunter was one of her students.
She's (and Pam Ware, along with my other teachers such as Mike Irwin, Spring Mason, and Ellen Sumner) one of those mentors I've always counted. And heaven now has better theatre with her in it.
-C
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