Heroes

Disclaimer:  I only ask, because I care...

Spoilers below to last night's episode of HEROES.

1) Please explain to me how Alejandro - who speaks no English - was able to hop onto the New York Times website, download a story IN ENGLISH and determine that Sylar was a killer.

2) I really don't care - because thank God, he's finally dead.  I've waited 9 episodes for him to die.  I won't even mention that he somehow magically learned English for the first time before he died.  I was just thankful he was dead.  The faster they can kill off the sister, the better.

3) Why is it that all the women on HEROES cry ALL THE DAMNED TIME?  If you turned last night's episode into a drinking game and took a shot every time a female character cried, you would be smashed before the credits rolled.  Which leads me to...

4) Does Maya do anything BUT CRY!?  Seriously, I had to hit mute every time she cries because my skin crawls.  Like the onset of a stroke.

5) How is it that when Sark (you can call him Adam or whatever Asian samurai name he was... we all know he's really Sark) and Peter magically knew the location of the virus once Brenda's mother from SIX FEET UNDER said, "Texas."  THAT WAS THE CLUE?!  TEXAS?  The virus is in Texas.  Thanks for being specific.

6) Why was Molly left home alone?  And if there really was a sitter, what sitter would leave a child when two strangers showed up?

7) Why was Veronica Mars following Claire at the beach?

8) Why is Suresh still alive?  (Please tell me he is one of the two heroes "who will fall" in the finale.  And by fall, I don't mean slip down the stairs.  I mean fall, like heads are blown off and people are going home with their director's chair as a gift, fall.)

9) When will Uhura realize that Sulu is dead?  How will she ever get home-- wrong show.

10) What sort of crack cocaine was being smoked in the writers' room when that whole, "I left the Irish chick in the future, but I have this sign in my hand so it must be true" speech was written for Peter?  Seriously, the look on David Anders face read "I know someone just explained to me what is happening in this scene, but I'm still confused, so I'm just going to say my lines so we can all break for lunch on time."  I'm so confused by this show now, I can't figure out if it's taking place in the future or the past any more.

11) If Claire's blood brought her father back to life, then why is he still in a hospital bed?  Claire herself could fall to her death and still make it to cheerleading practice.  Part two of that question:  were all of the male actors given gym memberships at the beginning of this season with a note that read, expect to be nude from the waist up in every episode?  Momma Pettrelli works out at my gym at night.  I'll ask her and get back to you.

12) Why is Niki/ Jessica/ whoever Ali Larter is playing now sick?  I totally missed that. 

13) Did Catwoman really need to watch a video iPod to learn how to jump over a two foot fence?  And why didn't she just check the front door?  And good note to have her wear a hoodie.  She totally blended at that point.

14) Is Adrian Pasdar even on this show any more?  Ditto Greg Grunberg.

15) And finally - is there a single character on the show without daddy issues?

Peace be with you.